Yesterday I came home quickly after school so I could finally empty my truck at the dump. The worker at the dump eyed me suspiciosly as he said, “Have you tied up that brush?” I answered with all proper fear and respect, “Yes, sir.” Then he asked, “In bundles?” Many sarcastic answers pounded at the back of my teeth, trying to get out of my mouth. I clenched my jaw. All I said was “Yes, sir.” After another suspicious look at me and my truckload, he graciously allowed me to empty the contents of my truck.
When I got home, I saw something in my garden that I was not supposed to see. It was a rabbit! Having my camera on hand, I got evidence of its presence. I’ve had more than a few seedlings have their heads bit off. And something has been eating the oxalis I got from my visit to Plant Delights Nursery. The oxalis will not survive. And now I know the culprit.
I ran inside to get my BB gun. I keep it handy for such times. But by the time I got it loaded and pumped twenty times, the rabbit was not visible any more. I risked carrying the gun out into the garden to see if I could startle the rabbit into the open, but to no avail. The rabbit has escaped me. Next time, rabbit. Next time.
Don’t you have a Mafia out there? Can’t you just put a hit out on the rabbit?
That’s Chicago.
Yeah, in Baltimore it’s just a bunch of thugs who shoot each other.
You should have just grabbed your shovel.
Trust me people, sticky rat traps
Do they make them bunny-sized?
I hope the worker at the dump doesn’t eye me suspiciously when I pull up with my concealed, nicely tied 5′ 11″ bundle …
To Peter: It’s good to have goals.
You Me
Polar Opposites
Hey, there were supposed to be more spaces between those words.
Bill Engvall comes to mind after seeing the “…in bundles?” question. (You know, the Blue Collar comic who made the phrase “Here’s your sign!” famous…?) I could hear him answer “No, I braided them and made lots of beautiful lace wreathes – would you like one? I’d be happy to share!” instead of the obedient and compliant “Yes, sir”. I bet Peter Rabbit would have had a pithy come back for the same remark! (If he were seen driving your truck, though, I wager the remarks would be a little different…)