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A Realistic Reproduction

I was in the grocery store the other day, and decided to get some cookies. Normally I don’t keep them in my house because if they’re there, I’ll eat them all in a single sitting. But lately, I’ve been having a craving for them, and instead of eating a few cookies, I’ll eat everything I can lay my hands on. So I got some cookies.

My conversion to diet soda continues to go well, so when I saw a sugar free version of Oreos, I thought I’d try them. What’s really interesting about these Oreos is that the replacement for sugar in them is maltitol, which means they are not a reduced calorie food. Two cookies equals 100 calories. These cookies may not be good for dieters, but they’d be great for diabetics. Zero grams of sugar!

They taste exactly like regular Oreos. Exactly.

One warning, though. Sugar alcohols like maltitol can only be taken in small quantities. The box actually says: “Excess consumption may have a laxative effect” I guess that will keep me from eating the whole box in one sitting. Ha!

I eat the middles first, then the cookie parts.

3 Comments

  1. Lauren

    That is crazy talk. Sugar free Oreos? Why not just eat sausage on two crackers? Tastes the same – zero sugar.

    Heh. I just woke up. I’ve decided not to make sense today.

  2. Carol

    He he…”in one sitting” – HA! Depends on where you’d be sittin’, I reckon. (rimshot)

    Soon as the fast food places start putting these in their children’s meals, you can proudly enter a burger joint and order a quadruple greasy cheese and bacon burger on a double-decker potato roll with a super size fry…and a diet soda…and a sugar free Oreo…please.

    Considering the white creamy filling of these things at least used to be made with lard, the no cholesterol or trans-fat thing is a huge improvement, especially if they taste “exactly” the same as the regular ones. You have hit the mother load, my friend!!

    P.S. Are you going through another growth spurt, or is it your “time of month”? Either might explain your “eat anything I can get my hands on” cravings…just speaking from personal experience there…

  3. Lloyd

    I smoosh the halves together then twist them apart so that I get a, more or less, equal amount of delicious filling on each half. Then I lick the filling off of one half and eat it.

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