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The Gift of Fatness

Happy Birthday, Mom! You share a birthdate with Keith Richards, Brad Pitt, and Katie Holmes.

My students have been bringing me Christmas gifts. While not expected, it is very nice to receive them. I was especially excited to get a bottle of honey from a girl whose family keeps bees. I am very interested in taking a beekeeping class this spring. They happen in March, so I have to remember in February to register. If you see me in February, ask me if I’ve registered for beekeeping class.

Many of the gifts coming in are food. I love sweet treats, but I’m only one person. Some of the packages are HUGE. That doesn’t stop me from trying to eat them though. During this week of standardized exams, my only job has been to read instructions and then go sit at my desk for 5, 7, 12, 20, 40, or 50 minutes. It’s a nice life. Except while I’m sitting there, the sweets call to me. Yesterday I ate almost a whole box of homemade chocolates. Carl gave them to me. Sheesh, Carl’s mom, are you trying to kill me? Mmmm… so good…

I saved the coconut for last, but ran out of time to eat it.

12 Comments

  1. Lauren

    You have a smelly pencil! I just bought the orange one for my room. Mmmm. What ‘flavor’ is yours?

    I love looking at pictures of your desk – it’s like playing I-spy.

    Happy Birthday, Mrs. Royuk!

    • Brad

      Did you see the alien bean pod on the desk next to the black marker? I still have it because I don’t know what to do with it.

      The Smencil is “Very Berry” flavor. Peggy gave it to me a hundred years ago, but I never use it. I just open the container and smell it every once in a while.

  2. Lloyd

    I got some homemade salsa yesterday. I like salsa.

  3. Michele

    At least your mom shares a birthday with two beautiful people!

    • Beth

      Yes. But the not-so-beautiful one is far more interesting. And talented. Did you know that Brent and Sandra almost named a son Keith?

      • Michele

        As with most teachers, some kids’ names can give you evil thoughts because of some previous encounter with a troublesome student. “Keith” … hmmmm … well, there’s one student here by that name that moves around like a crazy wild animal. Nope. Don’t like it.

        • Michele

          Now I’ve had some good experiences with the one Brad and handful of Katies I have known.

        • Karla

          That’s exactly why Arron picked out Zeke’s name. He’s never taught an Ezekiel before.

        • Beth

          That’s how we settled on Tara. Neither of us had ever taught a Tara…and we knew we’d have a Tim someday…and we’re into the matching initial thing.

  4. Peggy

    Happy Birthday Mrs. Royuk! I assume you’re turning 39…I mean this is the week for that, right?

    Now I’m off to see who shares my birthday….

  5. Michele

    Birthday Haiku for Mrs. Royuk:

    Happy Birthday You!
    Way out there in Nebraska.
    You look mighty fine 🙂

    Love, Michele

  6. Carol

    Not to be outdone:

    A birthday limerick (ahem)

    There once was a gal named Elaine
    Whose birthday fell softly like rain
    In the early December
    So all would remember
    The gift of a striped candy cane.

    (aka “Why Mrs. Frey does not teach literature”)

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